need

(Source)

106 backpacks for the children of Moberly.

This was a story on a town in Missouri where the school provides backpacks filled with food for children who go hungry at home. These kids are able to pick up the backpacks, property of the school, after school and walk out blending in with the other kids. Many of the items are things the kids are eat or prepare themselves, incase there is really no one at home to help them or if their single-parent is working full time. One kid told his teacher he wasn't eating the food and when the teacher asked him why, he said he was saving it for winter break.

The kinds of items that go in the backpacks.  (Source)

Stories like that -- one of many -- make me think. I hope that I never become too comfortable (or callous if you really look at it) that these stories don't touch my heart. It's easy to make fun when someone doesn't finish their plate and we exclaim, "Finish that! There are starving kids in Africa!" But really, there are starving kids next door, at your nearest school, closer than you think.

I first starting thinking about this when I was Christmas gifts brainstorming for friends and family. Tim and I have a present-amount-cap this year for Christmas since we have many expenses to be concerned about in the coming year, and that our wedding bands would count towards our presents this year. There are a few things I'd like. Really, things I want more so than things I need. I've been thinking about how even our present-amount-cap could be put to better use.

The same applies to our wedding. In the midst of writing big checks to pay off vendors, I want to be more concious of how we spend our money. I posted about favors just yesterday. Very fun, very cute, but really, is it necessary? And favors are just one of many trivial things. I don't want to fall into the trap of getting things because "you're suppose to have those at a wedding." And to start thinking about it from a don't-need-that angle than from a how-much-money-can-I-save even if it produces the same results. There are still many things that we want and don't need. The whole wedding itself can fall into that category. We could essentially do a courthouse wedding, and/or throw a dinner somewhere (that would still save buttloads of money) and use the money for a better cause. I think maybe even just... using the money for our daily lives (bills? rent? food anyone?) would be a better cause even if it's not all being given to the needy.

It's times like these were I'm REALLY glad we're not having a big bash. That we're not spending excessively on the wedding (according to middle class standards!) on one day. According to costofwedding.com, a wedding in my neighborhood [zipcode] would cost between $33,963 and $56,604 excluding the engagement ring and honeymoon. (The wedding cost or average spent is based on spending of other brides and grooms not wedding vendor prices.) Those figures sound like what I've heard from weddings past from people I know. For kicks, I looked up the city where we are getting married and the range was $68,231 and $113,719. Oh crap! Yeah, I guess it's a well-to-do town... and we're just bumming it on their turf. :-P

So... we aren't doing exactly cancelling the wedding to be social heroes.  And I'm not saying that it's bad for people to have nice, expensive weddings.  (More power to you if that's what you've got.)  But I think, for myself, I want to try to be more concious and aware of what I'm doing and why ("Do we really need that?").

Do you think your one-day bash makes a difference?  Or do you think... "it's my one day to celebrate, let me have it!"?  Would you use the money for a better purpose if you could?